My friend EG watched the kids today while I went to Hadley's parent/teacher conference. After picking them up, they were all wound up and excited after having so much fun playing. Hadley talked pretty much non-stop on the way home and right as we walked in the door she said "I told G I was going to give him a penis for his birthday. Penis is French for hot dog."

I swear I heard a record scratch.

I think I did a really good job of hiding my absolute horror though.

I just calmly said "Penis is not French for hot dog, sweetheart. You know that a penis is a male body part and it's not something you need to be talking about. It's not really appropriate, ok?"

She said "Ok, Mom" and immediately moved on to something else while I continued to stand there, with my coat still on and purse on my shoulder, in utter shock.

Parent/teacher conference was swell, by the way. She's doing swimmingly in everything. No surprise. She's 5 going on 35. My little rare bird.